22 – Alexi Hernandez

5 years old // Genderqueer/Non-Binary (they/them) // Colorado Springs, CO // Loves unicorns & their mommy.

Preferred name: “I’m a fluffy marshmallow!” – Instead of being called ‘Princess’, ‘Marshmallow’ is preferred. It changes, but prefers Alexi

On pronouns, and how it feel when others don’t honor them?

Alexi’s Mom: “Usually when we introduce ourselves, I’ll go first because that’s how Al feels more comfortable… I’ll say, ‘My name is Jennifer, my pronouns are she/her/hers…’ and then Alexi says…”

Alexi: “My name is Alexi, my pronouns are they/them/theirs… “

“If we don’t tell them my pronouns people call me he, and I don’t like that…”

“…it makes me feel sad [when others don’t honor my pronouns]… and it makes a lot of other people feel sad…”

“Some people ask, ‘Are you a girl or a boy? And I say, I’m non-binary…’”

“…At school there’s a friend, Allie-Beth, and she helped me. Somebody came up to me and asked, ‘Are you a boy or a girl?’ and I said, ‘I’m a non-binary… I’m a boy and a girl!’ Then the other person said, ‘Non-binary isn’t real…’ They said, ‘You’re a girl or a boy… those are the only things that are real…’ Then I whispered to Allie-Beth, ‘Trust me, and tell them it’s real!’ And she did tell them! Allie-Beth said the non-binary colors are black, purple, yellow and white. It made me feel good! I have other friends at school that know I’m non-binary…”

When did you know?

“When Marius told me what the word non-binary meant. I like the way you could be non-binary… and be a boy or a girl. I like the way you could have long hair as a boy and short hair as a girl.”

How old were you when you came out? What was it like for you?

“I was 4. I wasn’t even 5 yet. It wasn’t even June 7th yet… I liked non-binary. I knew I was a boy and a girl, and I liked that. I feel like we could all be non-binary. I feel like there were lots of sparkles. It made me feel like everyone in my family had magic… everyone was a little bit magical. And like people are camouflaged… and you can almost see them.”

What’s something you’re really good at?

“Making crafts and art…”

Favorite thing about the community?

“I like queer spaces, and going to pride…. And RAINBOWS! There’s one on the back of my jacket!!!”

Least favorite part about the community?

“I don’t like when people don’t believe each other… Like Chick-fil-A…”

Fears about telling people about being non-binary…

“What worries me is me when people don’t believe in non binary. When they don’t know what non-binary is and they don’t want to be non-binary. They don’t have to be non-binary…”

“I was worried they wouldn’t believe my pronouns… just not believing. There are kids at school that ask if I’m a boy or a girl… and when I answer they say, ‘That’s not quite real… so, are you a boy or a girl?’ I tell them, ‘Non-binary is real. Seriously guys!’ Then they’ll say, ‘ I think you’re a girl, so I’m gonna say she/her/hers…’ another will say, ‘You’re a boy, so I’m going to say he/him/his’… and then everybody follows…”

What would you tell someone who’s afraid to come out?  

“I would just tell you, you don’t have to do that… maybe it makes you scared. I would say it’s okay, you can be with me. You can be anyone you want, or you can just be yourself. You don’t have to be alone…”

What in your life are you most proud of?

“I’m most proud of that everybody says I look like a unicorn. I’m most proud of being happy and being who I am and having a great time.”

If you could change one thing in this world with the flick of a wand like Harry Potter, what would it be?

“I’m gonna be Harry Potter for Halloween!!! …I would change people who are not nice… I would make those people follow the rules, and make people believe that non-binary is real… that’s what I would do. Because I’m a wizard!

I would change Chick-Fil-A and anyone who doesn’t like Pride because I need people to like Pride…”

If there was something I could tell people about non-binary, what would you tell them?

“I’m non-binary… I’m not a boy or a girl… you have to believe…”

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